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The Abuse of Love
by Wayne Jackson
Love is a fantastic emotion, from both divine and
human vantage points. But it can be abused—and frequently
is. Of all possible emotions, love is the greatest. There is a sense
in which love even eclipses both faith and hope (see 1 Corinthians
13:13). Faith (trust) and hope are stimulated by love; all three
will abide, but love is the greatest because it will empower the
saint into greater adventures of trust and the realization of never-ending
promises.
It is perhaps the nature of the case that the thing
most precious is sometimes that which is most abused—and so
it is with love. Let us reflect upon two broad categories that illustrate
how love is abused.
“Love” as a Rationalization
Love is abused when one entertains the notion that
he can get by with doing evil under the guise “God loves me,
therefore he will not condemn me.” Legions entertain this
myth. That is why, in the viewpoint of many, rarely ever does a
person die lost. It is alleged that God simply would not permit
a person he has created and loves to be lost. His love is too marvelous
for that.
If that is the case, why did Christ have to die?
If Heaven’s love covers sin unconditionally, the death of
the Savior was absolutely for nothing! The entire thrust of the
Bible is opposed to this misguided idea.
Our mistreatment of others also is rationalized
under the umbrella of love. If you love me, you won’t fret
that I borrowed your car without asking. If you love me, you won’t
insist that I repay the money I owe you. On and on the excuses go—each
buttressed in the name of “love.”
What a gross abuse of “love” it is
for two people who are not married to become sexually intimate,
using the rationale, “We love one another.” God has
forbidden sexual intercourse outside of marriage; the sin is called
“fornication” (1 Corinthians 7:2). Human emotion (or
hormonal urge) does not negate sacred law.
“But we were in love” is a common rationalization
of those who would justify adulterating their marriage, or the marriage
of another. “Love” never is a license to sin.
“Love” as a Defense Mechanism
One of the most common misuses of love is the attempt
to ward off a kindly Christian chastisement with the charge, “You
are not a loving person.” Such a disposition not only reflects
a serious level of stubborn ingratitude, it evidences a manifest
ignorance of scripture.
Note this text: “My son, regard not lightly
the discipline of the Lord, nor faint when you are reproved of him;
for whom the Lord loves, he disciplines” (Hebrews 12:5; cf.
Proverbs 3:11). Dare we complain and pout when hardships come our
way (which could be providential admonitions)? The mature child
of God will be thankful, even in times of stress, that the Lord
loves him.
It is not uncommon for youngsters, in their immature
way of evaluating the events of life, to feel that their parents
do not love them, because of restrictions that are placed upon them.
They will learn better when they have their own children—if
they don’t destroy themselves by their youthful foolishness
before they reach that point.
Elders who attempt to lead the church in disciplinary
procedures against wayward members of the congregation are frequently
accused of being “unloving” (yet see 1 Corinthians 5:5).
How insensitive ungodly people can be, their understanding almost
totally bereft of what true love involves. Paul once inquired of
the foolish Christians of Galatia: “Have I become your enemy
because I tell you the truth?” (4:16). He might well have
phrased it like this: “Do you think I no longer love you because
I tell you the truth?”
Preachers are charged similarly. “He doesn’t
preach with love!” Perhaps some do not. Frequently, however,
this is a defense mechanism.
A minister of God can spend his days and nights
helping people; he can teach them rich truth, listen patiently to
them in times of trouble, give them assistance in hours of financial
crunch, help them in days of family crises, and assist them in burying
their dead—occasionally with minimal gratitude. But when he
feels the need to admonish them, because of a weakness or worldliness
in their lives, suddenly he has become “unloving.” Figure
that out!
Sin clouds a person’s vision. It distorts
reality. It generates a defensive, retaliatory disposition. It turns
true love, the agape kind (that which acts in another’s best
interest), into something ugly and hateful.
There is nothing more painful to the loving person
than having his/her love rejected; there is nothing so wretched
as rejecting true love.
Copied from: www.christiancourier.com/articles/read/the_abuse_of_love
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